


Dex and His Mainiac Stories

by dontstudywritenovels



Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-07
Updated: 2016-12-07
Packaged: 2018-09-07 02:47:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8780200
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dontstudywritenovels/pseuds/dontstudywritenovels
Summary: Basically, three different instances where we see Will use Maine Slang, and little bits of his relationship with Nursey along the way. I plan to make it a series. Self-indulgent in all ways possible. My first published work for the fandom!(:





	

**Author's Note:**

> Basically a disclaimer. I am not from Maine, so please direct message me any mistakes. Though, I am Irish so don't give me crap of the references I make to Irish culture. Thanks!
> 
> All slang translation can be found at the bottom of the work, but they should all make sense if read in context. Fingers crossed.

_ 1\.    _

 

      Derek hadn’t been exactly too please with the assignment his professor had practically regurgitated on them, especially since it was right before midterms, but he couldn’t say he was entirely unpleased to get to reread one of his childhood, or more like teenage, favorites instead of cramming for his math exam which he would undoubtedly fail.

So today seemed pretty chill in most terms, but given Derek’s luck, he probably should have known this was when shit would down; however, he would have pegged it at maybe a five of his shit scale -i.e. A coffee spill on his shirt, or maybe even his laptop crashing, _again_ . So when the doorbell rang -which first off, should have been a red flag because only visitors actually ring the doorbell, he didn’t quite expect the flour covered Bitty to open the door to a six-foot-three guy, who would have looked just like Dex, if it weren’t for the blond hair and the _baby_ in his hands.

 

“Oi, is Billy here?” And yeah, okay, that was a little bit of a head-turner as well.

 

Later when Bitty had coerced the man, which Derek now knew as James, into sitting down with the promise of Dex most likely showing up after his coding class, Derek’s mouth had yet to close. Derek tried to make eye contact with anyone from the team, but they all seemed to be trying to catch their own flies.

 

“Uh so, is she yours?” _Smooth,_ Derek.

 

“Yeah, ain’t she cunnin’?” The blond man smiled, pride in his eyes. Derek was about to voice how he had absolutely no fucking idea what that entire sentence meant, but that was the moment when his fellow d-man decided to walk through the front door of the Haus. Blondie’s head swiveled back, “Billy! Thank Jesus!”

 

‘Billy’ had stopped dead in his tracks, and really Derek can’t blame him. “Jimmy? What are you doing up ‘round here?” ….and, yeah, Derek was suddenly very confused again.

 

“Man, I need a favor and while this would be a humdinger of a reunion, I can’t stay long.” _What?_ “Some nummie kifed my babysitter. Can ya watch Marie for the week, please mate, I’m right out straight.”

 

Dex looked conflicted for a moment before nodding his affirmation, “Course, just I haven’t watched the ankle bitter since Moses wore knee pants, she still get wicked ugly during _suppuh_?”

 

“ _Yah_ , but you get her a little buzzed on and she’ll take it like a champ.”

 

“Christ, Jim-”

 

“By-the-Jesus, Billy, I owe you an arm! I don’t wanna look like I’m book’in it, but I _bettah_ get back to buggin.’” The blond spoke.

 

Dex shook his head, “ _Ah-yuh_ , I ain’t giving the kid booz, but she better not start chummin’ on me, or your head will be ten different shades of red after I wailit!” The front door had slammed shut by the time Dex finally made note of the rest of the guys in the kitchen. “You chirp me on my accent and I’ll stove-up you all.”

 

“I have no fucking idea what the means, bruh,” Shitty spoke, “but you keep talking like that and I’d let you do anything.”

 

Dex rolled his eyes, “And I don’t care what Jimmy said, you give little Marie even a swing of beer and-”

 

“Why would we give her beer dude?” That was Holster, “Is that was blondie was going on about?”

 

“You blokes are definitely city pukes all right, you don’t grow up in an Irish house without getting drunk at least once or twice before five.”

 

“There will be no alcohol in that precious one’s system in my house, Dex! How could you even-”

 

“I’m just checking Bits, jeez! I know you guys wouldn’t hurt the little spleeny.”

 

Bitty seemed satisfied with Dex’s answer, but Nursey’s mind was still playing catch up, “Wait, wait, you have to watch her all week? We were supposed to go see-” One look from Bitty shut Derek up however, “I mean, I guess, uh, I can help you out. Watch her while you’re in class.” Derek grimaced, him and kids did not mix.

 

“Let you hold this little newt, _naw_! That be a worse idea than giving her a frappe!”

 

“Bruh, if you weren’t dating Nurse right now, I swear-”

 

“Jesus, I spend five minutes with that nummie and I can’t stop talking like a moosetowner,” Dex sighed, shifting the blonde girl in his arms.

 

**2.**

 

     If you asked Dex how the day was, Derek learned the word he would have preferred to use was nippy. In other words, it was cold as shit. The team was bundled up in the Haus when Tango decided to play twenty questions.

 

“Dex what part of Maine you from?”

 

“Behind Allagash, out in the willie-wacks,” Dex replied easy, burying his cold nipped nose deeper into Nursey’s neck.

 

“Jesus, bruh, one day you are going to have to teach me all that Maine lingo,” Ransom spoke.

 

“Naw, you’ll just sound like some mistah man, who trynna act like y’all ain’t some wicked weird flatlander. Can’t be a _Mainah_ less you from Maine.”

 

“You wouldn't even teach me?” Derek pouted.

 

“Like hell I wouldn’t, who else gonna understand me when I’m ‘boutta get thumped for the last time.”

 

“I don’t know what that means, babe, but I’m touched, I think.”

 

**3.**

 

        Derek had been thrilled when Dex said his parent’s were coming for a visit, well scared too, but mostly thrilled. Though, if he was more honest, after finding out Dex had two dads, he thought they’d be more interested in meeting their son’s boyfriend.

 

“Will, have they even been feeding ya up here? I know you always had a peeked face, but you look mighty pekid!”

 

“You been keeping up with your old chummies?”

 

“Well if your Pa hadn’t taken the long way ‘round Robin Hood’s barn, we would have been here sooner!”

 

“Fatha, Pa! Please, I really want you to meet Derek.” Will was blushing red, as Shitty cooed from the background.

 

“Ah, _yur_ feller, well he’s mighty pretty, Billy, but your gonna need to feed ‘em some Italians if he gonna last through _winta_ ,” Will’s Pa said.

 

“Richard!” Dex’s father, the redhead, hit the blond man on the arm. “He means to say you look like a nice fella, Derek, it’s nice to meet you.”

 

“Nice to meet you too, sir. Uh, sirs.” Derek internally screamed.

 

“Now, Billy, it’s christly nippy up here, you need a new _winta_ coat?”

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Translations:
> 
> Cunnin: Cute
> 
> Humdinger: Very good
> 
> Nummie: Dumb guy/gal
> 
> Knifed: Stole
> 
> Right out Straight: Very busy
> 
> Moses wore knee pants: For a long time or a long time ago
> 
> Wicked: Very
> 
> Ugly: Upset
> 
> Buzzed on: drunk/buzzed
> 
> Book'in: Running away
> 
> Buggin: Lobster fishing
> 
> Chummin: to puke
> 
> Wailit: punch
> 
> Stove-up: Beat up
> 
> City pukes: People not from Maine or people who live in the cities(kinda)
> 
> Spleeny: (in context) kid
> 
> Newt: Kid
> 
> Frappe: Not! a milkshake! Has ice cream.
> 
> Moosetowner: Someone from Allagash
> 
> Willie-wacks: Out in the woods/rural area
> 
> Mistah man: joker
> 
> Flatlander: someone not from Maine
> 
> Thumped: Punched
> 
> Peeked: Narrow
> 
> Pekid: Pale
> 
> Long way ‘round Robin Hood’s barn: Not the shortest route
> 
> Italians: Sub sandwich


End file.
